What you have written is brave, truthful, mystical, beautiful.

I am warmed with delight that you have recognised so clearly that what you are experiencing is a calling.

May your learning and recognising continue to evolve and develop and lead you to ever greater understanding, and may all of that enable you to help others discover the unexpected God who is always there to be fascinated and bewildered and stunned and woken up by – and marvelled at.